Wednesday, January 18, 2017

[Fur Fiction] Lagomorphic Postal Services.

(A very early picture of Miss Lola - I think this was from her foster home)

Miss Lola Bunny woke up to a human staring down at her. "What?" she thumped, one ear going backwards in disdain.

"Coffee." The humom said. It was a simple word, but then, Miss Lola was pretty sure her humom was quite simple.

Miss Lola yawned and stretched. Oh, right, she was supposed to have fetched that yesterday. Not like the world was going to end. With a sigh she hopped off towards the closet to go fetch the stupid coffee.

* * *

Same Time, Next Morning.

"This is not coffee!" The humom complained. 

Miss Lola was pretty sure she wasn't getting paid enough.

"This is hot chocolate!" The humom continued.

"It could have been French! Canadians label their cans weird." In all honesty, she'd just grabbed the first she'd seen. Who knew humoms could be so picky? Well, she suppose she did, but she could be more grateful and less picky.

Miss Lola sighed and headed back towards the closet. 

* * *

Same Time, Next Morning.

"This is NABOB!" The humom protested, holding up a can. "And it's INSTANT."

"Then you'll instantly stop complaining? It's coffee. It's Canadian. What more do you want?" 

"Tim. Hortons. Coffee." The humom said in a tone that was probably supposed to sound infinitely patient, but to Miss Lola sounded like it didn't have nearly enough treats to follow it up with.

Miss Lola huffed. This was just ridiculous. She once again went back to the closet.

* * * 

Same Time, Next Morning.

"THIS IS A CAN OF YOUR POOP!" The humom complained. 

"Poop, coffee, what's the difference anyway?" Lola muttered. Enough was enough, she hopped over to the couch, grabbed her humom's tablet and nosed to Amazon. She then looked at her humom pointedly.

"You're supposed to be faster." Her humom grumbled as she placed her order.

Miss Lola gave full foot flicks to THAT as she hopped back to her hidey. She'd have to be paid five times as much to be faster than a bunch of silly humans in blue uniforms. And be able to read French, which obviously no sensible rabbit would want to do. Le lapin, her fuzzy white ass.